Day 10 and I’m in machine mode, focused on eating well and smashing it in the gym.

Day: 10
Date: 21/05/2013
Workout Day: 10
Weight (lb): 166.2 (5.6 lb loss)
Body Fat %: 15.2 (1.4% loss)
Health: Fine

With a new sense of determination I embraced the fasted cardio approach and did 20 minutes of light jogging on the cross-trainer before breakfast. There’s few things that make you more proud than getting up early to go in the gym and today I was pleased with my small victory, celebrating in the usual style with a plate of chicken and brazil nuts. Later on I headed back into the gym for my training session, which today was focused on legs. To sum it up in one word, I word describe this session as “horrible”. The intensity was constantly high with every element being designed to break you. (I expect there is a more scientific intent behind the programming, but it certainly didn’t feel like it today.)

The volume was ridiculous, the rest periods equally so and the tempo was nothing more than sadistic. I found that in almost every set it was my fitness/breathing/oxygenation that felt like the limiting factor, and not the capacity of my muscles. Looking back I know that it all blends into one, but with compound moves especially (e.g. squats) it feels like it’s the whole body that is failing rather than the muscles. The result was a regular sense of intense tiredness with the occasional flutter of dizziness and nausea, and a slight sense of hypoxia. The only time I have felt something similar is that moment when you’re particularly drunk, lie down on a bed and feel an overwhelming sense of discomfort as you feel the room spinning.

But again, as with every time, I got through the hour knowing that I gave it everything with a blind faith that I could squeeze a bit more out of each set next time. I have to credit Nick for a brilliant piece of programming.

Throughout the training session I was filled with one overriding thought, “Was all that gluttony over the years really worth it?” I don’t know how to answer that question, and am unsure whether I’m being too self critical, but for every moment of discomfort in the gym or displeasure at another plate of vegetables it does make me regret every chip sandwich and pot of Ben & Jerrys. This thought process always leads to the resolution that I’m never going to eat those “bad” foods again. No more chocolate and no more sweets. But I also know that this is a load of BS, and soon I will indeed want those foods and won’t remember the hardship of the gym today. I also know that the regrets are irrational, since all those instances of gluttony didn’t all accumulate into one big ball of extra fat that resides on my body. Yes I regret the gluttonous approach to food that resides in us all, but I also accept it is a core part of who we are, and something we should look to control rather than deny.

As for today, I certainly have no regrets on my performance in the gym. I left everything I had in there, and will resolve to keep doing this every single day until I reach my goal.